Net.Humor Archive - 6 Reasons Tinky Winky Can't Be Gay

To concerned parents, friends, Romans and countrymen -- you can relax now!

(Hope you've been following the flap Jerry Falwell started by announcing that the TeleTubby Tinky WInky is gay)

6 Reasons Tinky Winky can't be gay.

• The Purse doesn't match the shoes. Purple AND Red, I mean really, clash-o-rama.
• He's kinda obese. Everybody knows that gay men (especially public figures) are in remarkable shape.
• That headpiece. Where I rate it for its FABULOUS height, it really doesn't have much in the way of frills, its just a triangle. A true gay person would have accessorized it with beads and/or something frilly.
• He hangs out in a meadow.....ummmm skip that one, George Michael in the park ruined that analogy for me.
• He's a really bad dancer. Nuff said.
• The name Tinky Winky. I don't know a gay man on the planet who would go with a name like that....HELLO, it screams "I'm small down there and I don't care who knows it"

Sorry, Tinky can't be gay.